• Decode My Life

How do you know when you are hearing the truth?

Updated: May 31, 2020

All men lie. Yes, they all lie, even your man lies. Since, we live in the “Man’s world”, men have learned that they can lie, which they call “man truth” and never really have any consequences for doing it. Some men even try to see how far they can lie before someone calls them out or provide repercussions (if any).

Women manipulate. Yep, every woman manipulates. They mainly manipulate their relationships with their friends, family, and partners because they are codependent with everyone close to them and/or need everyone close to them codependent with them. After all, they are both in the “Separation from Truth” veil so how can the truth really be told.

So why do men lie, and women manipulate?

Well because these are the two pieces to the game that keep them in the game. Women feel that they have to manipulate in order to get their way because they don’t feel that they have the power to just tell the truth and have everything go their way. Men lie because they can, and if they actually started speaking the truth then there wouldn’t be any “Man’s World” where they maintain power and control. Think about it, if a man actually told you the truth before they did something.


1. You walk into your boss’s office, and your boss actually told you this “Hey, I need you to agree to start, process and finish this project for me that has been sitting on my desk for over a week but needs to be done by Friday, so that I can review quickly and send it up the ladder, take all the credit for it and continue to deepen my man group agreements with the other men here at the company. Oh, by the way, by doing this, it will never really get you anywhere with management or upper management. Hey, also, did you gain a little weight recently?

2. You are at the bar or restaurant with your girlfriend(s), a guy buys you a drink because you know, he is a “gentleman”. If he actually walked up to you after you just received your drink, and said,” Hi, my name is [man name], I see that you have accepted my free drink that I sent over to you, great! Let’s cut to the chase, you + me = my house, now would be good, but if you want to wrap things up with your girlfriend(s) and hang out just a little longer, I am cool with that too.

3. Your partner comes home, and he just got off the phone with his “bromance” (his “inner circle” guy friend). They just got done talking about their next “man outing”. What if your partner comes up to you after observing that your busy and focused on something else and said, “Hey honey, just got off the phone with [friends’ name], and we were talking about the next possible chance that we could get away from our families and responsibilities, and just go mess around doing “manly” things because honestly I know you’re not really thinking right now of what that actually means for you, but it does involve you watching the kids for two days, and the house, and getting all the errands done. But don’t worry, when you want to go get your hair done next Saturday, I will make sure to tell you how fucking crazy you are for thinking that one person could watch the kids for two hours. Also, I didn’t really think about how me going and hanging out with the guys actually affects you because honestly, I just assume you’ll take on all the responsibility.

If you actually heard the truth from a man in any situation and figured out their motives (which is to keep you in the “Man’s world”), you would approach things very differently.

However, Woman want to believe the “Man Truth”: your boss tells you that “only you could accomplish the project” and that “upper management has their eye on you because you’re working so hard and they have noticed!”, the guy at the bar/restaurant “specifically picked you out” and “damn right you deserve a free drink and attention”, and finally your husband “just works so hard and needs a break” and “you know your super woman and can take on everything, bring it!”.

So instead of just calling the man out on their lies because they feel they don’t have any control or power to do so, they worry too much of what the consequence would be, or they want to believe the “Man Truth”, they manipulate the situation. The women who needs to get the project done for their boss, goes to her team or other women and starts dishing out pieces to the project. The women at the bar/restaurant takes all the free drinks and attention she wants and finds some crazy way to get out situation, usually getting a girlfriend involved. And finally, the wife where the husband just wants to take off for two days with his guy friends, allows it but holds that over his head until the day he dies, using it any chance she gets to throw in his face to get something out of it down the road. None of these reactions really work nor evolve the Woman, it just makes them codependent on other women. Taking on other’s responsibilities and/or process and keeping them in The Game of Separation.

So, what if women stopped manipulating and told/acted the truth back to men? What if women did the following responses/actions back to the three men in the examples I had?

1. The woman starts asking questions back to her boss to understand more of the situation and/or project, “Wow, by Friday, that only two days away. That doesn’t seem like a realistic time frame to get an important project done. When did you get notice of this project? What are my resources to use for this project? With my other priorities, how would you rank this project? Let’s schedule a time to sit down and go through the project and who/how the results are going to be presented.

2. The woman at the bar/restaurant responds back to the guy who just bought her a drink. “Oh, thank you for the drink, here let me buy you one, it would only be fair of me to do so.” The woman can go on further to explain that you’re here to just hang out with your girlfriends and take a break from the week. Set the boundaries of expectations with the guy and be truthful in the conversation. If you don’t want to have a conversation, make it clear and walk away.

3. The woman could respond back to her husband, “Oh that’s sounds like fun, so you going to arrange for some help while you are gone and get all your responsibilities done before you go? Also, that helps me out a lot because “the girls” wanted to plan a girl’s weekend a couple weeks later. Let’s sit down later and start mapping out everything out: responsibilities, resources, plans, actions, etc., so it’s a win-win for both of us and were both agreeing to the plan.

In all three situations, the women are standing her ground, eliminating all the “man agreements” that are being thrown on her, forcing the man to start to think about his thoughts, actions and words (sound familiar?).

All these action items get to the truth and once you get to the truth, you can start getting out of this component of The Game of Separation. The man will challenge you when trying to get to the truth, they need you to keep playing their game in the “Man’ world” because honestly what would the “Man’s world” look like if it was just men? It wouldn’t look like much, Men wouldn’t have anyone to process for them, they would all be doing the “Man dance” with each other and they would be looking around for something to dump their process on.

Let’s get back to what is truth, there is only one truth and that truth is God’s truth. And I am not talking about the “Man-made god”, I am talking about the one and only true God, Male/Female, Infinite, Eternal. The “Man-made god” was created to keep everyone in the game and the “Man-made god” doesn’t know the truth and has no power over anyone that understands the truth.

How do you tell the difference between the “Man-made god” (or a false god), and the real God? Your hair stands up on your arms, you get shivers, you get overwhelming emotions, or you get a three times sign. When God really wants you to listen, he/she will shove the truth in your face until you get your lesson. While you’re in the Game of Separation, how does anyone know the truth inside the veils and/or game? It’s extremely hard, you got to trust God is giving you the path out, you listen and pay attention to what is around you, God is constantly showing you some part of the puzzle.

How to Evolve: Tell the truth and nothing but the truth, so help you God.

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